Christmas Routines
Originally published at Youthworks.net on 7th October, 2020. © Youthworks 2020.
“Hey, Dad. Dad. Daddaddaddaddad. DAAAD!”
“I hear you. What’s up?”
“Dad, what are those things over there?”
“What things? Those things? The stones… by the side of the river?”
“Yeah. What are they? What do they mean?”
“You know what they are. They’re the stone of remembrance. We pass them every month on the way through to town.”
“I know. But I like the story. Tell me again.”
I wonder how many times this conversation happened in ancient Israel. It is certainly what God anticipated would happen. This is why he commanded Joshua to place the stones at the side of the Jordan River, near Gilgal. It was a constant source of remembering for the people of Israel—from parent to child, from generation to generation—to recall the events that took place when the Israelites first stepped foot in the Promised Land after years of wandering the deserts of Sinai (Joshua 3-4).
Children love repetition and routine. If we’re honest, us adults like routine as well. We have regular brands that we buy, cafes we frequent, clothes that we wear, and regular rhythms that get us out of bed and out the door in the morning.
Some routines happen by accident. There is an orchard not too far from where my family lives where we love to get fresh apples from. This orchard also stocks honey lollipops. I’m sure the first time we combined the purchasing of fresh apples with a honey lollipop for the trip home was a moment of gratuitous frivolity. But now, it’s not just assumed, it’s expected.
Other routines are intentional and often take hard work. As parents, my wife and I had to be diligent in getting our young children in the routine of brushing their teeth. Through much toil, we have successfully achieved Independent Teeth Brushing status and leveled up to the next parental challenge; the regular application of deodorant.
Why is it that we work hard at establishing these kinds of routines?
Because we know that the end result of good dental hygiene is worth the effort.
How much more significant was the routine that Joshua established at Gilgal, in obedience to God’s commands!
Through the consistent reminder of these stones, generations of Israelites would grow up knowing the great story of God’s faithfulness to his people. His rescue of them from slavery in Egypt. His patient forbearance and grace during the 40 years of grumbling in the desert. And his blessings on Joshua as his chosen leader, to bring the Israelites safely into the Promised Land of their inheritance.
Routines, especially those that revolve around the retelling of stories, help us to remember who we are. When we remember the stories of the Gospel and the grand narrative of Scripture that we are caught up into, we also remember whose we are.
This is why Christmas is such a wonderful time to establish good family rhythms and routines which remind us of the Gospel story. As we intentionally build in family routines, we can continue to remind ourselves of the rescue better that Egypt, the leader better than Joshua, and the inheritance better than what the Israelites received in the Promised Land.
Here are three routines that you might consider intentionally building into your family Christmas celebrations.
Advent Wreath
Many of us are used to Advent Calendars, counting down the days until Christmas discovering the surprise behind each window. Chocolates, Lego, or flavoured coffee bags have been some personal favourites. I have also seen some great variations on the typical advent calendar that make it much more explicitly about Jesus. From reading a verse each day or adding a character to a nativity scene.
However, in the last few years, our family has appreciated the rediscovery of the Advent wreath and candles. This is something that has never been part of my church tradition growing up, but discovered whilst researching traditional German Christmas practices for my son’s school project some years ago.
The main feature of the Advent wreath are the four candles which represent hope, peace, joy and love. During the first week of Advent (typically the first week of December), your family lights the hope candle each evening over dinner. In the second week, you light both the hope and peace candles. The third week, hope, peace and joy. And finally in the fourth week, all four candles are lit. As you go through each candle, you can read a verse that communicates the hope, peace, joy and love that is ours because of Jesus’ first coming and promised to us in anticipation of his second.
As well as the spoken word being present as you read the Bible throughout the week, there is the lovely visual symbolism of the dining room becoming brighter each week you get closer to Christmas Day, when the light of the world was born.
Generous Giving
We all love presents! Both giving and receiving presents are one of the hallmarks of Christmas (pun intended). While we certainly can—and should—protest the rampant materialism and gross consumerism which dominate the season, there is also something theological about finding ways to be generous to others as Christ has been so generous to us.
Many families in Australia are in a position to give good gifts to their children at Christmas time. However, there are also many who cannot.
Both in Australia and overseas, there are families and children living in poverty or with other particular vulnerabilities, which means that Christmas does not mean tables filled with food, homes filled with family, and trees filled with presents.
There are many excellent organisations that provide means by which those families with plenty can share their resources with more vulnerable children. I have involved my kids in choosing presents for children their own age and gender for both Prison Fellowship’s Angel Tree and Kmart’s Wishing Tree in previous years. We have also been involved in Tear’s Useful Gifts and Samaritan’s Purse’s Operation Christmas Child at various points in the past.
These initiatives are obviously a great blessing to the children who receive gifts they would not otherwise be able to afford. However, the process is also a formative routine for my own children as they go through the process of choosing gifts that they would like for themselves, but then wrapping them up and giving them away to another child, particularly one they are unlikely to ever meet this side of glory.
Open Table
Finally, another way that we are able to establish a routine of generosity at Christmas is by intentionally looking to invite others to our family Christmas meals. It is a distinctive characteristic of God’s people—both in the Old and New Testaments—that they care for the orphan, the foreigner and the widow (Deut 10:18; Jas 1:27). Christians caring for the vulnerable in their community is a reflection of our God who has cared for and rescued us out of bondage to sin and death.
There will be people known to you in your church, your street and your community who do not have family to celebrate Christmas with this year. It may be the university student who has moved into your suburb from out of town, the elderly couple whose children have moved interstate, or those mourning the recent (or not so recent) death of a beloved family member.
Talk with your children about who you know in your community who may not have somewhere to celebrate Christmas and then with your children, invite them to join your family for a meal. Help your children to see that your generosity in opening up your family’s table is a reflection of God’s generosity to us, and a reminder that all are invited into the wedding feast of the Son.
What intentional routines can you cultivate in your family this year that nurtures the faith of you and your children?
What patterns can you establish, that as you do them together, your children have the opportunity to ask “Why are we doing this?” To which you can answer, “You know why! But let me tell you again. One day an angel appeared to a young girl named Mary…”